Tuesday, March 6, 2012

I am Human

In case you read this blog and think, "Geez Wife A is always encouraging and sharing uplifting messages," I will now show you that this is not always true. Maybe you don't think that haha but I do really try to share uplifting messages that can help us all in our sometimes not so wonderful moments.
For the last few days I have just been down in the dumps. There really is no reason or anything big behind it. Just little things that over time build up and evenutally catapult out of my body. I have been sad, frustrated, and annoyed. Small things will make me want to cry, I'm not a cryer. It's like pregnancy hormones without the being pregnant part ;). Last night as I was once again crying to my husband about quite insignificant things he was trying to reassure me. Encourage and boost my self esteem. Then he said something to the effect of, "In reality this is probably Satan working on you. Trying to make you feel insignificant and worthless." I fully believe that and even know that yet somehow it is still hard to 'just be better'. Satan really is a bugger! He knows how to push our buttons better than anyone in this world. (And that's sayin something). I know that the things I am doing right now are right. I know that Heavenly Father is watching over me and is proud of the person I am. I like the person that I am. I am grateful to be a wife, mom, and friend but sometimes it is just so overwhelming. Sometimes there are too many people to worry about. My house is never going to be clean, I mean really, never. I'm not going to get thanked for everything I do, big or small. I am not going to get an award everytime I make a meal for someone or watch their kids. Dirty diapers and wet underwear are going to continue. Hardships in extended family members are going to keep coming through the years. And big decisions are going to have to be made. I am however going to be blessed by my Heavenly Father. I am going to be provided for. I can be in tune to know what I need to be doing and who I can be helping. I am going to help someone in need whether they verbally say thank you or not. I do get to stay home with my kids, which is very difficult at times, but something that I am most grateful for in this life. Occasionally my sink will have no dirty dishes in it and the floors will be crumbless, well maybe for 30 seconds. Maybe there will be one day, or one hour, of no toddler fit throwing. I guess what I am getting at is that I know life is overwhelming. I know it is difficult and I know that Satan is a nasty conniving little bugger that sometimes I really don't like. Through all of this I know that it will be ok. I can be sad and frustrated but I have to remember that life is good. I am more than blessed. I have everything I need and a lot of things I want. I trust in my Heavenly Father and I do ask him to guide me to people who need me. Therefore I should 'listen and obey' as I tell my kids and do what my Heavenly Father is asking. Life is a roller coaster of that I do know. May I cast Satans thoughts out of my head and remember what a truly blessed life I live.

1 comment:

  1. No joke Wife A... I just talked to Maurice about this VERY thing today! Whether it Satan you believe in (which I do) or a negative force or whatever... it IS real... and it can be such a destroyer! I've felt so down the last 4 days or so... about stuff that is so insignificant... about other people's happy blogs or how I feel inadequate or insecure or not good enough... BLAH BLAH BLAH! M reminded me today that I need to push out those thoughts... very far away...

    Just wanted to say I'm TOTALLY with you on this one. I've felt it too but I feel so much better after meeting with him ;)


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