Thursday, September 22, 2011

H.A.L.T.

I mentioned earlier that Pete decided to tell his dad about his addiction, and doing so has been so helpful.  His dad shared with us the acronym H.A.L.T.  It stands for "Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired."  These are the psychological/emotional "places" where temptation most often occurs.  Looking back I can see how it is true, not just for my husband but for me as well. 

Pete is out of town this week at a training.  All day he sits in meetings and then in the evenings he has been busy catching up with work/emails.  One day the training was particularly boring and after being away from me and the family he was feeling both tired and lonely.  His thoughts started to wander and by the time he returned to his hotel room he was struggling.  Usually as soon as he checks into his hotel room he puts the tv remote in the safe and punches in some random code with his eyes closed.  This time the maid had noticed the remote was missing and left a new one.  After fighting for a few minutes, he finally called his dad, and they worked out a plan.  He took his computer down to the hotel lobby and did his work there.  When he called me that night I suggested he return the remote and he told me he had called the front desk and asked them to turn off the purchase movie channels.  By then the temptation had mostly subsided and he was in a good place again.  Rising above this episode of weakness has been so good for both us, but especially him and I'm so proud of him for it. 

Travel is so hard.  It's hard for me because the trust isn't there completely and sometimes I get sick with worry.  It is hard for him because it is a perfect storm for temptation to occur.  But knowing the triggers and having/making a plan is helping so much.

4 comments:

  1. WhatA wonderful success. That is some strong willpower. My husband is looking for work in international business and I know that means travel some day. And that scares me. Sounds like we may be using your tips some day.

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  2. By the way, I'm the anonymous who linked to my post on my friend's blog. Figured I should give my voice a name if I were going to follow your blog.

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  3. MAC I'm glad youre following us, even though it's something I wish none of us needed. Thank you for your great comments and wonderful link you sent us. Jane excellent info for us all to discuss with our husbands. I am glad his dad has been so helpful to you guys.

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  4. MAC-Your post was wonderful, I feel like I could have written so many of those words, they describe so much of what I've been through and how I feel. I noticed it was over a year ago. I'd love to hear how things are going these days. hisstrugglemystruggle@gmail.com - Jane

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